"This will make Cathy Santoni shut up about her stupid moped!" or D.J.'s Very First Horse (2.4)

The Tanners are going country this week! Jesse is in a stable with UgBaby and they're playing with a baby chick. I used to go to a fair every fall growing up and picking up the baby farm animals was one of my favorite things to do. Baby chicks are so adorable. Too bad Michelle had to ugly up this scene. Becky, meanwhile, is snapping pictures of them because she totally wants what's in Jesse's pants. She's just busy being all coy and prudish. Whoops, veered off-topic there.

D.J. and Kimmy are also in the stables, petting a pretty brown horse named Rocket. Apparently Rocket's for sale and the cost of food and stable fee breaks down to $100 every other week. Wow, that seems really inexpensive. I mean, I know it's a ton of money to an 11 year old, but wow.

Ah and now the point of why everyone's there in the first place. Danny and Becky are shooting "Wake Up San Francisco" on the farm. Danny's supposed to milk a goat. Clearly, hilarity will ensue.

D.J. and Kimmy think it would be totally rad to own their own horse, way cooler than say, Cathy Santoni's moped. Once they determine that they can't get the money from their parents, they plan to dip into their savings and shopping funds, respectively, to pay for the horse. D.J. theorizes that if they manage to take care of the horse without incident for 2 weeks, then their parents will have to let them keep the horse.

The next 2 weeks are glossed over with a montage of D.J. riding and taking care of Rocket to a cheddariffic cover of "Good Day Sunshine." It's time for the girls to pay up for Rocket and Kimmy shows up at the stable dressed in a brand new cowgirl outfit. Ruh roh. Somebody finked out on ya, Deej. Kimmy just can't resist shopping. Silly Gibbler. D.J. confesses that she can't afford to keep Rocket, but asks to take him for one last ride. The foolish old man trusts this conniving child and foolishly asks what harm is there in one last ride. Oh just you wait, Old Fooly McFooled.

Stephanie's hanging out with her token Asian friend Harry. She makes him her specialty, cheese donuts. I myself used to indulge in the cheese donut in my youth. For those unfamiliar, it consists of partially folding the cheese slice and biting a hole into the center. Now, although I enjoyed them once upon a time (last week), the thought of someone else biting into my cheese is positively nauseating. They go into the living room where D.J. is standing with Rocket. Since she couldn't afford to keep him in the stable she brought him home, and unfortunately he followed her into the living room.

Jesse comes into the kitchen and picks up one of the cheese donuts. Ick! Again! Jesse then happens upon the horse in the living room and calls for back-up from Joey. The guys try to help D.J. out and when Danny arrives home, try to lead him into the kitchen with his eyes covered. He catches a whiff of Rocket and asks Joey if he's making his special chili again. Ha! and, Ew!

Just as he's almost in the kitchen, Danny opens his eyes and turns around. His eyes bug out and his expression is priceless. He immediately turns and bursts back into the living room. Obviously he loses it and tells D.J. that he isn't sure that he can ever trust her again. He makes her return Rocket and the stable owner asks if she'd like to meet Rocket's new owner.

"We've already met." It's none other than Becky! Apparently being on the farm for the show made Becky realize how much she missed Nebraska, so she decided to buy Rocket and says D.J. can ride him anytime she'd like. Too bad that much like D.J.'s guitar playing, we'll never hear about Rocket again, until both music and horse plot lines are recycled later on in the season on the younger Tanner girls. Good day, Sunshine.